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June 18th, 2007
07:57 am - Kathmandu, the city that sleeps
I walked home last night through the dark back streets of Kathmandu at mindnight . The only thing that stirred were the many stray dogs and the distant meowing of gentle cats. The entire city is deserted by night, but you'd never guess it at 5:00 in the morning when the air fills with the alls of roosters, the bells of puja (worship) and the songs of prayer.
In the mornings I climb to the top of the six story tower of a house I am living in, as I ascend the stairs I pass the kitchen where the eldest daughter is preparing curry for breakfast , then I pass Indu , the mother of the house , kneeling and burning incence ropes in prayer, until I finaly emerge ontop the flat open rooftop to look out over Dillibazar, my residential area of Kathmandu. From here I can see countless women washing and hanging cloths, I can see the small shops that many families run right out of their homes . There are no closed shop doors in Kathmandu, the stores are all open right onto the street .
Yesterday I I caught a bus (which does not take the time to stop, only to slow down so you can jump in) and road it, no bigger than a large van, with 12 odd Napelese men and women . I jumped out after handing the driver 13 rupees, (20 cents) and headed through the secret back alley to enter into the most breathtaking site yo u can imagine. I stood, an ant, before a stupa (buddest pyrimid/tower) that rose up into the sky . Ropes covered in tibetan prayerflags streched all the way from its peek to the wall infront of me , whipping in the wind. I walked past this site and into the beautiful, colorful and reverent monestary where I will be teach the young monks to speak english, not because tourism in such a big industry in nepal, but because the head lama looks out at the world and sees english speaking people lost and suffering and he wants to share with them the Dharma (religious philosiphy) that has brought him peace and joy.
This city , this country , this universe , is more vibrant and alive than I can possibly share.
I send you all my love.
I hope this summer brings enlightenment and peace to you all,
Namaste,
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February 7th, 2007
11:03 pm - When I wander through my Mind it is a Forest
I think I've all the way lost my pen-pal from New Zealand. It's strange. It upsets me more than I expected it to.
It's such a strange feeling to let go of a new piece of what you were raised to believe. It's light. It's nice. Light is nice. And it feels like nothing can weigh you down. To think there are a thousand more things to let go of that will keep taking me to the next level.
Maybe I have been known to claim that I've suddenly changed completely. Well, I'm Dylan, and even though with every passing moment I loose who I was, and am entirely new, change happens slowly, and I'm changing in a positive direction.
And I've been sick for the last 5 days. I missed church. I hate this kind of dibilitating sicknes. But I'm getting better. I think I'll be back to full by Friday.
So I've been thinking about how we humans seem to group everything together in arbitrary piles; black, asain, male, female, hippie, lawyer, Libra, Capricorn. And I guess I'm wondering, is there a use to it. I mean, I am just Dylan Glenn, and if you consider me seporately from all those catagories, you'll get to know me better, but are they still useful in some way?
(If you think of an answer, I'd love to hear. But I'm not that interested in thoughts, I really anly want to hear it if you feel it too. Its gotten really hard for me to swallow words that seem like just thoughts without any heart. Anyway,)
Peace,
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February 3rd, 2007
01:49 am
It's been a long time since I've been here.
Shit, a lot has happened in the last month. I've been picked up, dropped, kicked aound, spat on and left lying out in the cold, and I've never felt so comfortable with myself. It's strange, but experiencing the real, deep pain that comes from taking the risk of loving has really shown me how much I can handle. I'm a pritty powerful guy. And I have the ptential to get all the way to the center. I know I can escape all the distractions, attractions and dependanceies, and really get to that place I know exists.
It's been a long time since I've been here, and I'm not sure there is anything left for me in these dusty pages. I'm writing to an audience that has likely walked away ages ago. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't go back now. I've got me, God, and a couple poeple I have really let in, but I get to go up from here. This is just the begginning. It only gets better from here.
I'm tired, wiped out, exhausted, but I've got so much further to go. And I'm not even close to giving up. I wonder who or what will join my life next.
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December 22nd, 2006
12:16 pm
This is just a little too poetic.
I;m the last one on campus. My dorm is closing in a minute and I;ll be out in the cold, wandering around Williamsburg. I kind of like it. Having to face down this place, with none of the friends I've made, without the comfort of a place to be or the security of knowing I belong. I don't belong anymore. I withdrew. When I swipe my card, the doors don't open anymore. They've changed the locks on me. So I'm just a visitor again, but thats ok. I think I'd like to be the visitor more often. Setting down roots doesn't sute me right now.
Time to go.
I'll try and keep my eyes open long enough to remeber this feeling.
It's peaceful to have nothing, even if only in a moment.
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November 13th, 2006
03:48 am - It's all a matter of perspective
I think of how impossible it is for anyone to ever completely understand me. No one will really ever know precisely what I have experienced. And the tought makes me feel so alone.
Then I think from a different direction.
And let myself be amazed that someone can understand me at all. And that every little bit forms connections, connections that may never really die. And then I feel connected, knowing that I'm so very far from being alone.
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November 8th, 2006
08:06 pm
It's hard for me to keep studying when all I want to do is create.
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